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Jimmy Tingle is ready to take on the political machines of Barack, Hillary and John as he focuses in on his Jimmy Tingle for President campaign. |
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Tingle talks the talk — and puts the ‘fun’ in political function
By Sue Harrison
Banner Staff
Confused about who to vote for in the upcoming presidential election? Now there’s a real choice — comic and political commentator Jimmy Tingle.
Sure, everyone is used to Tingle’s biting political commentary and laugh-out-loud twists on all kind of topics but now he’s showing he’s got what it takes to sit in the big chair in the big Oval Office. His latest show, Jimmy Tingle for President, will make it all crystal clear or at least as clear as politics ever gets.
Tingle will appear at 8 p.m. Saturday, May 24 at the First Congregational Church on Main Street in Wellfleet. In addition to winning some votes for the tough uphill battle to the White House, Tingle’s show is a benefit, part for Payomet Performing Arts Center in Truro and part for Wellfleet Preservation Hall.
General admission tickets are $25, but $40 gets you preferred seating and a party with the Tingle-man after the show. Tickets are available online at www.payomet.org or at the box office, (508) 487-5400.
But enough about particulars, let’s talk platform.
“Even if I don’t win, and there is a chance I won’t, we still will have had the effect of creating some social change,” he says. “We are creating something more tangible than just laughs, we have the possibility of real change at the end of the day.”
Now he’s starting to roll.
“I’m a stand-up comic and commentator and I’m running on my comedic record. I have no legislative record but I do have 25 years of comedic insight I’d like to interject into this campaign. I am going to create solutions to real problems like global warming, taxation and education. I’ll talk like a candidate but with humor.”
When asked what the biggest issues are he narrows in on healthcare and global warming.
“I’m not all gloom and doom,” he says. “Look how far we have come with global warming, we have Cape Wind, all those windmills planned for Nantucket Sound. I say, OK, Deval (Gov. Patrick), why not think about some other windy spots? Why not the breakdown lane of the Mass Pike?
“This is the Tingle difference, we would be using the power of wind generated by foreign oil [from cars rushing by] to generate power and ultimately reduce our dependence of foreign oil.”
The Tingle administration would also put little windmills on all the traffic lights. His critics have asked him what happens to traffic if the wind stops blowing. Easy, he says. “If there’s no light, you don’t have to stop. Do you know how much oil we use idling at traffic lights.”
But wait, there’s more.
“I would broaden the definition of national defense to say that healthcare and education are a form of national defense. And drug treatment is too. There are people out there who can’t get into treatment. Either they can’t afford it or the centers are full. If we have the technology to put a nuclear warhead on a submarine why can’t we turn those subs into underwater treatment facilities? The best part, you can’t get out. And, we can utilize the underwater treatment subs as our first line in the war on drugs. Spot a suspicious boat and the sub can stop it. Turn Lindsay and Britney loose on the suspicious boat and they’d find those drugs.”
Asked about the other candidates, Tingle takes the high road.
“I don’t want to get into negative campaigning but I do embody the best qualities of all the candidates. I will transcend race, gender, religion and class. They are afraid of me. They don’t want my ideas to get out into the public.”
And unlike some candidates that won’t take a position on controversial issues like immigration, Tingle is fearless.
“I love immigrants,” he says. “Do they not embody the best qualities of America, of the Pilgrims? They sneak into America to work. Think about that. It’s like someone breaking into your home to clean the house.”
artseditor@provincetownbanner.com
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May 22nd, 2008